Totally unrelated to the photo: I was searching for wedding photos today, and I found one of the alternate texts for the wedding announcement Alex and I eventually sent out. Background: I was not very motivated to do any of the planning for the wedding, so my ever-ingenious wife did almost everything (not to slander Amanda, who also did almost everything). I am still not sure why we didn’t use this text for the official announcements. It’s pretty awesome, yo:
when the oceans are infested with large-eyed baby seals
when the sky turns a pale shade of mango
when the land is filled with people of no discernible moxy
when the moon’s cheese curdles diagonally
when the stars spin around as if seen through a drunken Viewmaster
that is when we know
there must be… a Reckonating
the woman who hails from the icificated lands of the North
who frightens children with tales of large noses and pyroclastic flow
who fills the stomachs of her friends with vegetable matter
who blogs like a class-12 mage
whose shoes know no structural integrity
whose prose is free of grammatical errors
who patiently seeks the ultimate chicken strips
the man who was born in a town that does not exist
who lives in the land of the eternal enchilada
who frightens students without telling them any tales at all
whose accent is feared in Quebec
who has no master but distractibility
who has no mistress who has not already been broken up with
who ponders the dark spaces behind his refrigerator
these will meet when the sun is all toasty
under the sign of the golden trumpet
to decide for the ages
who is smooched
and who is later also smooched
there will be refreshments
0 comments ↓
There are no comments yet...Kick things off by filling out the form below.
Leave a Comment