Protesters at the convention. Here’s why.

A nice hallway scene at the convention center.

A view of the exhibit floor. It was really pretty huge. Surprisingly, we only used 1/2 to 1/3 of the floor space at the convention center for exhibits. We did, however, use all the meeting rooms (around the edges, on 2 floors) almost all the time. This convention is too #$@% big.

Weeeed in the wiiiiind…

well, not exactly, but I have spent a buttload of time on this stupid proposal. I mean the Department of Homeland Security proposal. After a furious re-submission period over the last few weeks (occupying lots and lots of time I would have preferred to spend doing other things), just this morning we were informed that funding had been “delayed.” For at least two years. So, feel free to do the research if you like, but on your own dime.

To recap:

Spring 2007 – Original proposal
Summer 2007 – Tweaking, re-submitting, etc.
Fall 2007 – see “Summer 2007″
February 2007 – Awarded $300,000 per year, for 6 years
March 2007 – Psych! Suckers! No money for you.
March 2007 – Re-awarded $75,000 per year for 3 years
April 2007 – Lots more frantic writing, rescaling projects to the smaller amount
May 2007 – Award reduced to $75,000 per year for 2 years
May 2007 – Award “delayed” until 2010
May 2007 – DHS can bite me

This was taken last Saturday, on a teeny dredge island in the Laguna Madre, between Port Mansfield and South Padre Island, TX. Every time I see sights like this — kayak beached while lucky owner(s) hang out in outdoorsy leisure — I feel definite envy for the owner. Well, on Saturday, I was that guy. In your face, mindless urban drudgery!

The freedom in the photo also presents something of a contrast with my current feelings, which stem from being forced to produce documents and answer the questions of a frighteningly unchecked national police force to justify my fully law-abiding travel.

I’m here in Harlingen, TX at Valley International Airport (code: VIA, but note that the code HRL still works for some travel sites… heh heh). Not a bad little place. 2 or 3 times bigger than my home airport of McAllen International (MFE), and nearly an hour away, but HRL has Southwest, which saves me between $100 and $150 on this flight. Yay!

Unlike some days, I got through security with no problems (yay!). However, unlike any day in my experience, we just had half a dozen TSA agents put on their uber-creepy blue latex gloves and roam through the gate area, asking to see everyone’s boarding passes. What? They were nice about it, and very businesslike, but I am also convinced I absolutely had no choice. I suspect the niceness lasts exactly as long as you do what they tell you.

I grew up during the Cold War. The Soviet Union was a freaking scary monster. I am still convinced of this. Republicans built long and lucrative careers by reminding us of the Soviet threat to the freedoms and privacy we enjoyed as Americans.

Ironic, then, that a perhaps-unprecedented increase in centralized government authority (especially, it would seem, police authority) and, as a result, steepest reduction in American freedoms have been driven by a Republican presidency and congress. Who would have guessed? Me, I would have thought it would be the Kennedys, and that the Republicans would try to stop them. Boy was I wrong.

I saw a bumper sticker on my way here. It said, “Had enough? Vote Democrat.”

Yes, comrade, my papers are in order.  Am I free to go?

by M.F. Luder
November 16, 2007

The intelligence community is defending the addition of non-mainstream Caucasian Protestant groups to its racial-ethnic-religious profiling guidelines. In a press conference this morning, national security associate director John C. McGrathnick described surveillance and cataloguing of “pre-fundamentalist Caucasian Protestants” as a natural next step in the progression of demographic profiling by police agencies. Under the new practices national and local agencies, from the FBI and NSA to community police forces, will be required to maintain lists of “potential asymmetricalities” in American communities. Individuals and groups placed on these lists will for the first time include Caucasians and Protestant Christians whose lifestyles and religious beliefs fall outside the norm, under the rationale that non-mainstream religious and cultural groups are at higher risk for producing terrorists and other national security threats.

“It’s not just a case of keeping tabs on people who are different,” says McGrathnick. “It’s a matter of priorities. Non-mainstream religious and cultural groups frequently have beliefs and ways of life where adhering to the American status quo is not the most important value. It’s simple logic. If you believe that God, or Jesus, or Buddha, or whoever, is more important than being a good neighbor, and a law-abiding citizen, then it’s a no-brainer that you’re a potential threat to this nation.”

Under the new guidelines, for example, Free Methodist groups in Washington State are not considered high-risk groups, while Free Baptists in Alabama are. Last-wave New-age Acolytes in Southern California are not on the list, but Latter-day Saints in Southern Utah are.

The degree of devotion that individuals show to their “alternative ideologies” is also an important factor in whether or not they will be subject to police scrutiny.

“We are not nearly as concerned, as a security-minded nation, about the tendencies of individuals whose behavior patterns show little influence from their alternative ideologies,” said McGrathnick.

Thus, Reform Jewish synagogues are not being catalogued, while Hasidic Synagogues are high on the list.

“When you come to understand just how much of daily life is influenced by some of these alternative ideologies, you begin to comprehend the level of security threat such people represent to this nation,” said Angela Merdin, Assistant Secretary of National Security Matters. “We are finally facing the glaring fact of White political-religious extremism in this country. Timothy McVeigh, Ted Kaczynski, Eric Rudolph, Jim Jones, David Koresh, the Ruby Ridge incident… the list goes on and on. If those kinds of people are able to exist in this country, then we’ve clearly got a problem with certain groups and mindsets.”

Although Merdin has described the demographic profiling as “nothing for ordinary citizens to be concerned about,” she also hinted that individuals and communities listed as potential threats may be required to maintain their own registration with national and local police agencies in the future, or face legal consequences such as permit revocation or financial asset seizure.

Civil liberties groups have already voiced strong protests, several promising lawsuits. However, according to Alan Jackman of the Civil Defense Action Group, there is a concern that these efforts are doomed due to “…the American public’s willingness to rubber-stamp anything with ‘national security’ in the title, since 2001.”

The above is a totally fictitious parody, and any resemblance to real people or events is purely coincidental, just like in the movies (luckily, so is this, at least for a little while, although similar plans have been proposed in other U.S. cities). I wrote this less to make definitive statements than to keep thinking about the questions.